What sad anecdotes! if you haven't been keeping a log of the time you get the kids, and the issues you have with the parents, start now, and don't inform the biological parents what you're doing. Make it accurate to the best of your ability, and don't make it judgmental, or opinionated, try to make it as-factual as-possible.
The purpose of the log is to have a record of the behavior of the parents, and also that of the children. When they tell you, "I had my notebook and colored pens stolen by a big kid at school today," that's exactly how you should record it. If the parent shows up to assume custody of the children and they have been drinking, and are intoxicated, you may have to face the sad prospect of calling the local PD to keep your grandchildren out of harm's way. It might be better to try and get the parent(s) to allow you to keep the children for the night, and to get the kids to school the next day, until the parents can show up sober and straight. Might calling the PD mean substantial legal issues for the parents? Unfortunately, yes. Could they then retaliate by refusing you access to the children? Again, yes. But you need to consider the safety of the children. Obviously you don't want the Department of Children and Families social worker and the PD to show up and to assume custody of the children when the parents are incapacitated, and if you report them. But that's where your log of behavior comes into play. You have a written record of issues and behavior over time, and involving both the children and the parents. The court may look more-favorably upon your petition to assume custodial care if one or the other or both of the parents end up incarcerated.
This is such a sad topic, but your interests are correct, trying to salvage the children, to provide them with a safer, more-stable environment. The children know who's giving them a safe place to be, free of alcohol and other substance abuse, someplace where they get good meals, people who care for their needs, making sure their clothes are clean, that their place to sleep is secure, and home life is free of drama that unfortunately happens frequently when they are with their parents.
Do not make disparaging remarks about either of the parents in-front of the children. Focus your remarks on the positive things that the children do, not on the poor behavior of the parents. They need to have positive reinforcement, because apparently they already have daily negative reinforcement at the hands of their parents.
