Southern Cops

[SpecOps13]

Southern Cops have a way with words...!!!*
*
*
*
These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos:*
*
*

1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through..."*
*
2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight, because they're new...
They'll stretch after you wear them a while..."*
*
3. "If you take your hands off the car,
I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document (My Favorite)..."*
*
4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired..."*
*
5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second...???
Because, that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you (LOVE IT)..."*
*
6. "You don't know how fast you were going...???
I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh...???"*
*
7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help...
Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor...???"*
*
8. "Warning...!!! You want a warning...???*
O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket..."*
*

9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not...
Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog...???"*
*
10. "Fair...??? You want me to be fair..???*
Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy,*
corn dogs and step in monkey poop..."
*
11. "Yeah, we have a quota... Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven..."*
*
12. "In GOD We Trust; all others we run through NCIC ( National Crime Information Center )..."*
*
13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had...???"*
*
14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore...
We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can..."*
*
15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours...*
So you know someone who can post your bail..."
*
AND THE WINNER IS..*
*
16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets...??? You're right, we don't... Sign here..."

 

[Bill Seward]

The last one reminds me of a speeding ticker I got on my RD350. The cop checked "Female" on the ticket, then advised me to carefully read the ticket before going to see the judge. Who then threw the ticket out and tod me to slow down.

 

[Jan Bee]

I was pulled over by a policeman once and he said "I see here you are supposed to be wearing corrective lenses".
I responded " I have contacts".
He responded " I don't care who you know says here you should have you glasses on".

 

[SpecOps13]

Going through Ga. back in 1970, I was pulled over after cresting a hill on a 2 lane road. The speed limit was reasonable for the type of road (60 or so) but just after the crest dropped immediately to half that speed. The cop wouldn't accept that I was engine braking to slow the car. He explained that I could pay the fine or wait in jail, through the weekend to see the Judge. I followed him to a house where we walked in on a woman who was knitting in the living room. She stopped, looked at the ticket and collected the fine. Telling us to be safe now....:bang head:
The Cop was already gone. Likely setting up the next visitor.:rofl_200:

 

[Wirenut]

I was pulled over by a policeman once and he said "I see here you are supposed to be wearing corrective lenses".

I responded " I have contacts".

He responded " I don't care who you know says here you should have you glasses on".

Nice


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[frank5079]

I haven't gotten a speeding ticket since 1995...I have veterans plates on all of my vehicles and if and when I do get pulled over, I have my driver's licence and my military ID in a double window ID holder similar to this...

After the officer runs a check on my tags and licence and finds that I have no outstanding warrants or points on my licence, he lets me go and tells me to keep my speed down along with a "Have a nice day." and I respond with a "Same to you officer and be careful out there!!!"