Trumpfs Microwave.

[Bill Seward]

And Kellyanne comes up with yet another punchline!

 

[caseyjones955]

Your going to do another Trump post and nobody said anything about a day without women! NOBODY!

Do you have ANY idea how hard I had to bite my lip on that one!

:clapping: :rofl_200:

 

[Bill Seward]

We don't need women, we got VMaxes!

 

[caseyjones955]

Cant I have both? I think the key to happiness is to have a Vmax always at your side and women you put in a taxi when the evening is over.:spanka:

As fun as that was to type I'm sure glad my awesome wife has a sense of humor.

 

[SpecOps13]

I Love Kelly Anne and her Microwave joke. Sure stirred up the mainstream media. Next, the Trump team will be Aliens invading........

 

[Kronx]

I can see the alien invasion in my head so clearly. Trump holds a press conference.

"Outer space is not sending us it's best aliens. It's sending us anal probers, crop circlers, and coneheads. And some, I assume, are Jedis."

"I will build a wall around Earth and I'm going to make Jupiter pay for it."

And then a few weeks later there's a tape released of Trump and Capt Kirk on the Enterprise and Trump has a microphone and their swapping their tales of female alien conquest:

Trump: "I moved on her like Wookie. I tried to **** her, but I got comet blocked."

Kirk: "Damn your girl with the green skin is hot!"

Trump: "I better clear our my brain. I got a great brain. Sometimes I can't help myself when I'm around Martians. I just start mind melding right there. They'll let you do anything in zero gravity you know. You can Vulcan grip them by asteroids and tell them you'll come in peace."

And then more concerns rise when videos are released of Trump praising Darth Vader as a great leader. "He's probably one the greatest leaders in the universe. And I know because I own Miss Universe. But he's certainly a better leader than Princess Leia. Who by the way is a 4 at best. My daughter is way hotter than Vaders. But Vader and I have a great relationship. When we had Miss Universe on the Death Star he treated me very nicely. We have a great relationship."

Then evidence and accusations of Darth Vader death choking Democrats surfaces. Trump responds: "*Trump waves his hand in a slow arcing motion like Obi Wan . I don't have a relationship with Vader. But what's wrong with trying to have a good relationship with the Sith? Sure he has killed a lot of Jedis, but do you think Jedis havent done some bad stuff with lightsabers?

I mean it could have been Darth Vader that choked those Democrats but it could have been Cylons or China or 4 ton slug on the planet Hutt."

Then in another interview Trump is asked about the heroic Luke Skywalker blowing up the Deathstar:

Trump: "First of all, he's no hero. He got his hand chopped off and got his *** kicked by a yeti on Hoth. I like Jedis who don't sleep in the bowels of a tauntaun Ok? And secondly the destruction of the Death Star is fake news. It's totally fake. A lot of people tell me the Death Star still exists. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, you tell me. But the bigger problem is who leaked the plans of the Death Star? Why isn't anyone looking into that? I want congress to investigate who leaked the plans to the rebels."

Then criticisms of Trump spending almost every weekend playing golf on the moon after criticizing the former president for Golf Trips.

Trump: "I have to go to the moon, it's the only place where E.T. hasn't tapped my phones. And microwave cameras can't see me on the dark side of the moon. Which was a totally overrated album by the way. People tell me that watching me on the Apprentice is way better than seeing Pink Floyd live."

:eusa_dance:

 

[Itgoes]

LOL :rofl_200:

 

[Kronx]

I can see the alien invasion in my head so clearly. Trump holds a press conference.

"Outer space is not sending us it's best aliens. It's sending us anal probers, crop circlers, and coneheads. And some, I assume, are Jedis."

"I will build a wall around Earth and I'm going to make Jupiter pay for it."

And then a few weeks later there's a tape released of Trump and Capt Kirk on the Enterprise and Trump has a microphone and their swapping their tales of female alien conquest:

Trump: "I moved on her like Wookie. I tried to **** her, but I got comet blocked."

Kirk: "Damn your girl with the green skin is hot!"

Trump: "I better clear our my brain. I got a great brain. Sometimes I can't help myself when I'm around Martians. I just start mind melding right there. They'll let you do anything in zero gravity you know. You can Vulcan grip them by asteroids and tell them you'll come in peace."

And then more concerns rise when videos are released of Trump praising Darth Vader as a great leader. "He's probably one the greatest leaders in the universe. And I know because I own Miss Universe. But he's certainly a better leader than Princess Leia. Who by the way is a 4 at best. My daughter is way hotter than Vaders. But Vader and I have a great relationship. When we had Miss Universe on the Death Star he treated me very nicely. We have a great relationship."

Then evidence and accusations of Darth Vader death choking Democrats surfaces. Trump responds: "*Trump waves his hand in a slow arcing motion like Obi Wan . I don't have a relationship with Vader. But what's wrong with trying to have a good relationship with the Sith? Sure he has killed a lot of Jedis, but do you think Jedis havent done some bad stuff with lightsabers?

I mean it could have been Darth Vader that choked those Democrats but it could have been Cylons or China or 4 ton slug on the planet Hutt."

Then in another interview Trump is asked about the heroic Luke Skywalker blowing up the Deathstar:

Trump: "First of all, he's no hero. He got his hand chopped off and got his *** kicked by a yeti on Hoth. I like Jedis who don't sleep in the bowels of a tauntaun Ok? And secondly the destruction of the Death Star is fake news. It's totally fake. A lot of people tell me the Death Star still exists. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, you tell me. But the bigger problem is who leaked the plans of the Death Star? Why isn't anyone looking into that? I want congress to investigate who leaked the plans to the rebels."

Then criticisms of Trump spending almost every weekend playing golf on the moon after criticizing the former president for Golf Trips.

Trump: "I have to go to the moon, it's the only place where E.T. hasn't tapped my phones. And microwave cameras can't see me on the dark side of the moon. Which was a totally overrated album by the way. People tell me that watching me on the Apprentice is way better than seeing Pink Floyd live."

:eusa_dance:

Edit: Sorry for the silliness. I've been up for 2 days and a bit delirious.

 

[Bill Seward]

No apologies needed. That was hilarious! Trumpf at least is good for being a perfect target for complete unrelenting mocking...

Too bad he spends all day spewing more and more outrageous lies.

Great hair, though.

 

[42Below]

Speaking on the other sid eof the world Im very glad drumf doeant have total support.

I did see a piece online (so authenticity is 50/50) saying his administration had pushed a lot of legislation through seemingly under the radar due to all the Russian microwaves spying on walls in Mexico. Or something. Maybe you have some alternative facts here?
A smokescreen is an old trick but it still works huh....

 

[Redbone]

Entertainment works in many ways.

 

[caseyjones955]

Speaking on the other sid eof the world Im very glad drumf doeant have total support.

I did see a piece online (so authenticity is 50/50) saying his administration had pushed a lot of legislation through seemingly under the radar due to all the Russian microwaves spying on walls in Mexico. Or something. Maybe you have some alternative facts here?
A smokescreen is an old trick but it still works huh....

Many of us are happy he lacks total support, our expectations were realistic about his lack of fitness for the position. Just that the alternative was even worse, if you can imagine!

 

[tothemax93]

Entertainment works in many ways.

hook, line and sinker every time.

 

[Kronx]

Speaking on the other sid eof the world Im very glad drumf doeant have total support.

I did see a piece online (so authenticity is 50/50) saying his administration had pushed a lot of legislation through seemingly under the radar due to all the Russian microwaves spying on walls in Mexico. Or something. Maybe you have some alternative facts here?
A smokescreen is an old trick but it still works huh....

I wouldn't say they've done it under the radar. The reality is the majority of Americans pay little attention to facts and details of politics. That's a fact no matter who is the president.

The small percentage of Americans that do follow what congress is doing, the majority of them subscribe to the echo chamber of their preference - whether it leans left like MSNBC or leans right like Fox News -- then they just follow whatever those sources tell them. And between the media(both right and left) and Congress they know how to exploit America's stupidity and short attention span.

I don't blame them for doing it, I blame Americans for letting it happen. For example, the recession that caused so much unemployment and poverty and all of the retirement savings that were literally robbed by Wall Street was only 8 years ago... yet most Americans have already forgotten what caused it.

Imagine this scenario: 38 years ago, you get a loan for your home through a small local bank. You've paid your house off 8 years ago. Then out of nowhere Bank of America comes in and says "You missed your mortgage payment with us... we're foreclosing on your house. Get out in 30 days." Wait what? I didn't even have a mortgage through you!? And paid it off 8 years ago! Then you are literally removed from the house you paid for by a bank who never had anything to do with your house. They literally steal your home from you.


That's not fiction... that actually ******* happened... quite a few times.

Wells Fargo just last year was found guilty of creating millions of accounts under peoples names without their approval... and charging people fees for those accounts. They do this because they can tell their shareholders "Look how many accounts we have and how many people are banking with us." And their stock prices goes up. I know, because I was one of them. I've never banked with Well Fargo my entire life, but they sure as **** tried charging me for an account they had created illegally under my name.

You'd think **** like that EVERYONE would agree on is wrong. But you'd be wrong. It gets spun that restricting banks from robbing people stifles economic growth. Or that restricting plants from dumping their toxic wastes in streams and rivers kills jobs.

But they haven't done this covertly or under the radar. They've done it up front and open for everyone to see. They just know America is a land rich of stupidity and short memories. That is ultimately why our Republic will fall. It was designed to be run by the people but the people are asleep at the wheel. Or perhaps the better analogy is instead of driving they've asked Wall Street to drive while they blankly stare out the window and occasionally(every 4 years) ask "Are we there yet?"

 

[caseyjones955]

I wouldn't say they've done it under the radar. The reality is the majority of Americans pay little attention to facts and details of politics. That's a fact no matter who is the president.

The small percentage of Americans that do follow what congress is doing, the majority of them subscribe to the echo chamber of their preference - whether it leans left like MSNBC or leans right like Fox News -- then they just follow whatever those sources tell them. And between the media(both right and left) and Congress they know how to exploit America's stupidity and short attention span.

I don't blame them for doing it, I blame Americans for letting it happen. For example, the recession that caused so much unemployment and poverty and all of the retirement savings that were literally robbed by Wall Street was only 8 years ago... yet most Americans have already forgotten what caused it.

Imagine this scenario: 38 years ago, you get a loan for your home through a small local bank. You've paid your house off 8 years ago. Then out of nowhere Bank of America comes in and says "You missed your mortgage payment with us... we're foreclosing on your house. Get out in 30 days." Wait what? I didn't even have a mortgage through you!? And paid it off 8 years ago! Then you are literally removed from the house you paid for by a bank who never had anything to do with your house. They literally steal your home from you.


That's not fiction... that actually ******* happened... quite a few times.

Wells Fargo just last year was found guilty of creating millions of accounts under peoples names without their approval... and charging people fees for those accounts. They do this because they can tell their shareholders "Look how many accounts we have and how many people are banking with us." And their stock prices goes up. I know, because I was one of them. I've never banked with Well Fargo my entire life, but they sure as **** tried charging me for an account they had created illegally under my name.

You'd think **** like that EVERYONE would agree on is wrong. But you'd be wrong. It gets spun that restricting banks from robbing people stifles economic growth. Or that restricting plants from dumping their toxic wastes in streams and rivers kills jobs.

But they haven't done this covertly or under the radar. They've done it up front and open for everyone to see. They just know America is a land rich of stupidity and short memories. That is ultimately why our Republic will fall. It was designed to be run by the people but the people are asleep at the wheel.

Agree 100%
We hear what we want to hear and then forget it as soon as it no longer effects us, or sooner. This is evidenced not only by our political landscape but also by the fact that Wells Fargo has even a single customer left after pulling what they did. For the last 15 years I have dealt ONLY with credit unions. Forget about the outright large scale fraud and theft of WF and other large banks, has anyone looked at a fee schedule of their bank and still come to the conclusion that a credit union is not superior in every way, especially for personal banking. No doubt were not ******* paying attention because most of the bad political and business practices that happen on our soil happen because we simply step aside and allow it. Just like Clinton or Trump for POTUS, I have been asked by friends abroad how that could be allowed to happen and I have no better answer than what Kronx pointed out.

 

[Kronx]

Many of us are happy he lacks total support, our expectations were realistic about his lack of fitness for the position. Just that the alternative was even worse, if you can imagine!

I wish I could echo the same sentiment. I think Trump is just as horrible as Clinton.

We joke about Kelly Anne Conway's microwave statement, but if we circle back to that... lets not forget why she's even having to talk about this. Because Trump made a VERY SERIOUS accusation with ZERO evidence.

I mean we have to acknowledge just the common sense error of making a claim with zero evidence alone is problematic. But for a president to make claims of another president of high crimes and espionage against another without ANY evidence to back it up is just ******* mental to me.

Now the head of the Intelligence Committee Devin Nunes, who is a loyal a Trump supporter, even claims there's ZERO evidence of this wiretap accusation.

So lets refresh the history here: this is the same president who spent 5 years claiming he had proof Obama wasn't born in the US and never provided it. Claimed 3 million illegals voted for Clinton again providing NO evidence even though they said they would. Claimed Ted Cruz's father was involved with the JFK Assassination with providing no evidence. And now claims he was wiretapped with no evidence. Where is the line with him? What WONT he do?

This man has proven time and time again he has no problem pulling outrageous claims straight from his ***. And so what happens when you've got a president whose "Make America Great Again" hat is made of tinfoil actually has to deal with a SERIOUS crisis?

Other than Pence and Mad Dog Mattis, who in my opinion is the best ******* decision Trump has ever made(I ******* love Mattis - wish he would run for president), Trump doesn't have any cool headed and capable people around him that I trust to handle a crisis.

He has the most powerful intelligence apparatus at his disposal, it aint perfect by any means, but it still FAR more reliable than getting his info from Steve Doocey and Alex "The Newtown Shooting Was a Hoax" Jones which is where he keeps going for his "intel briefings."

Whose Trump going go to if that buzzcut wacko in North Korea lands a missile on an actual target instead of an open sea? I HOPE he picks up the phone and calls Mattis, but I fear he'll call Jones.

I might disagree with a presidents policies, but I want to at least know if they have a nut to fasten on a bolt they knows to reach for a wrench in the toolbox and not a hammer. That's what I didn't like about Clinton. I know she would reach of the hammer. But with Donald "Nobody Knew Healthcare Could Be So Complicated" I have no clue what the hell he will reach for -- at this point it seems like he would skip the tool box and go into the kitchen for some more foil.

 

[Kronx]

Agree 100%
We hear what we want to hear and then forget it as soon as it no longer effects us, or sooner. This is evidenced not only by our political landscape but also by the fact that Wells Fargo has even a single customer left after pulling what they did. For the last 15 years I have dealt ONLY with credit unions. Forget about the outright large scale fraud and theft of WF and other large banks, has anyone looked at a fee schedule of their bank and still come to the conclusion that a credit union is not superior in every way, especially for personal banking. No doubt were not ******* paying attention because most of the bad political and business practices that happen on our soil happen because we simply step aside and allow it. Just like Clinton or Trump for POTUS, I have been asked by friends abroad how that could be allowed to happen and I have no better answer than what Kronx pointed out.

It really does shock me anyone would have anything to do with Wells Fargo at this point. I can only assume it's just people willing to roll the dice and think "Wont happen to me." Wells Fargo has a long history of fraud.

I know I tend to sound like a broken record, but I think one of the reasons we let a lot of this happen is because America is so wrapped up in a Left vs Right war and those in power use that to manipulate the populace to vote against their best interest. There's going to be ideological differences between parties -- that's to be expected, but every...single...issue is painted either blue or red. America can't seem to find a middle ground on one damn thing.

I mean you'd think we could at least agree that Labradors are the best dogs and that Chevy is far superior to Ford. unk: :th_peace:

 

[caseyjones955]

It really does shock me anyone would have anything to do with Wells Fargo at this point. I can only assume it's just people willing to roll the dice and think "Wont happen to me." Wells Fargo has a long history of fraud.

I know I tend to sound like a broken record, but I think one of the reasons we let a lot of this happen is because America is so wrapped up in a Left vs Right war and those in power use that to manipulate the populace to vote against their best interest. There's going to be ideological differences between parties -- that's to be expected, but every...single...issue is painted either blue or red. America can't seem to find a middle ground on one damn thing.

I mean you'd think we could at least agree that Labradors are the best dogs and that Chevy is far superior to Ford. unk: :th_peace:

Puh-lease! you did NOT just drop that bomb and leave the room, uh uhh! :no no no:

First, I dont have the inclination or crayons to help you understand that anything is better than GM, so rather than tackle this age old fallacy, I'll state another truth that is impossible to deny: Lexus/Acura is vastly superior to Ford or GM! Take THAT! :looser: yea, what ya gonna say now, huh, thats right, NOTHING, huh! yea! :nyah nyah: I foiled your plot to get a reaction, or do we count this as a reaction. Damn! haha.

The Lab thing is hard to deny, I've had a black lab for the last decade and other than being quite obstinate she is a damn fine dog.

 

[Kronx]

Puh-lease! you did NOT just drop that bomb and leave the room, uh uhh! :no no no:

First, I dont have the inclination or crayons to help you understand that anything is better than GM, so rather than tackle this age old fallacy, I'll state another truth that is impossible to deny: Lexus/Acura is vastly superior to Ford or GM! Take THAT! :looser: yea, what ya gonna say now, huh, thats right, NOTHING, huh! yea! :nyah nyah: I foiled your plot to get a reaction, or do we count this as a reaction. Damn! haha.

The Lab thing is hard to deny, I've had a black lab for the last decade and other than being quite obstinate she is a damn fine dog.

Haha, I did just drop that bomb. Honestly, I kid about the Ford/Chevy thing. The two current cars I have are a Ford Focus and a Chevy Equinox. No complaints about them other than that Focus transmission shifts very oddly. I thought something was wrong with but apparently its just the nature of that transmission. :confused2:

I remember when I was in high school, we had just relocated to Douglasville, GA from McComb, Mississippi. On my VERY first day of school, taking the bus home two kids got into a HUGE brawl in the back of the bus over which was better - Ford or Chevy. And the cherry on top was that these two guys were twin brothers! Their dad was some TV wrestler. No one famous though. But I though WTF!? brothers actually fist fighting over Ford and Chevy?

And I love Labs. This December I had to put my 10yr old chocolate lab down due to a neurological disorder. Loved that dog. My son came home from tech school to be there too. Girlfriend made him an awesome last meal... steak, gravy, bacon, and some dog food.

 

[caseyjones955]

Haha, I did just drop that bomb. Honestly, I kid about the Ford/Chevy thing. The two current cars I have are a Ford Focus and a Chevy Equinox. No complaints about them other than that Focus transmission shifts very oddly. I thought something was wrong with but apparently its just the nature of that transmission. :confused2:

I remember when I was in high school, we had just relocated to Douglasville, GA from McComb, Mississippi. On my VERY first day of school, taking the bus home two kids got into a HUGE brawl in the back of the bus over which was better - Ford or Chevy. And the cherry on top was that these two guys were twin brothers! Their dad was some TV wrestler. No one famous though. But I though WTF!? brothers actually fist fighting over Ford and Chevy?

And I love Labs. This December I had to put my 10yr old chocolate lab down due to a neurological disorder. Loved that dog. My son came home from tech school to be there too. Girlfriend made him an awesome last meal... steak, gravy, bacon, and some dog food.

Sorry about your dog, loosing a dog is really a tough one. After I posted I had to think back, I've had my lab for 12 years and she was an adult when I rescued her from the pound. She was past the date to be put down but they kept her in the office to preserve her in hopes of adopting her out. Near as I can tell shes no younger than 15 and has quite a frosty face now, and showing no signs of slowing down. It will be a sad day but I know in dog years shes already on borrowed time.

I'll forgive the Chevy thing this once but I'm afraid it will have to go in your permanent file :clapping: