A Friend Is Gone and I don't Know Why...

[SpecOps13]

Got some really bad news this morning. I've been wrestling with it all day. I can't even say who it is right now... Guess it's still being investigated...

Anyhow, you are all as close to real brothers as it gets for me. Help me deal with this, please. I just can't sort it out and my brain is on overload trying to.

I've known this friend for 25 to 30 years. He had a successful business that he recently turned over to a younger guy. Like a son to him. He was pulling some cash from the business to live on. Absolutely no problems existed there. He seemingly had everything. Cool Cars, Vintage Motorcycles, everything paid for. He worked as a pit crew member for a pro drag bike racer, just for fun. He wasn't married but seemed just fine with that. He had girl friends.

He totally cleaned his house, took his dog, "Case" to the Vet. The dog had been having some Seizures but didn't seem to be in any immediate danger. My friend went out into his fenced back yard, Sat in a chair and killed himself. Probably with a firearm I've handled in years past... He and I did gun shows and some shooting together.

I've dealt with death all of my life. Even caused a few in South East Asia. Those were necessary. Even friends being killed on motorcycles, I can get past. Atleast they died doing what they loved.

I'm left bewildered and saying WTF..... This was a totally senseless death....


Dave

 

[Dr.n2o]

Holy shit man...It's hard to figure out why someone would do themself in especially when you've known them for so long. you'll think about it for the rest of you're life and still never understand. Happened to someone close to me a few years back....Keep you're head up man...we all have our demons, we just deal with them differently...I'll pray for you're buddy...my condolences

 

[maleko89]

So sorry man, I hope you find an answer.

 

[CaptainKyle]

Sorry to hear this dave don't really know what to say. If there is any thing I can do let me know.

 

[one2dmax]

Sorry to hear Dave. Likely there will never be an answer to what was troubling your friend. Hopefully you and his family he did have can forgive him for it.

Sean

 

[jbretthorton]

Wow Dave-O, sorry to hear that...
Life is challenging sometimes...

 

[twistedmax]

Very sorry Dave, I went through it a couple years ago with a very close friend, I can only tell you that ........................shit ,I cant tell you anything you dont all ready know, everything happens for a reason weather we can figure it out or not.

 

[sdt354]

This happened to me a while ago Dave, My buddy and I rode our bikes to a few bars, got a little happy then went to his house to finish it off. I never saw him again. He did the same thing with a 44 black powder pistol. We went tot the gun club at least once a week, rode or bikes all the time together. And, no one has any idea 16 years later what happened to make him do it. He too had anything anyone would want.It still hurts when I think about it.
May your friend and my Buddy Sandy both rest in piece.
Trying to figure it out caused me more pain. I hope you get through this and get answers quick if you get them at all. pm anytime Bro. or [email protected]
Regards,
Steve

 

[sdt354]

Anyone ever thinking of doing this, please stop and think of what will happen to your friends and family. It's not worth it, most bad things in my life come to an end on their own.
Think about it!

 

[Rollie]

Dave , I am truly sorry to hear of your loss. Unless he left a note , you will probably never know why.

My best friend Doug , we were both 18 , did the same thing , and I still don't know why. I still think of him , but over 47 years , not as often as I used to. I trust one day we will meet again , and he'll tell me why.

Hang in there , don't beat yourself up , 100,000 to 1 chance you could have done anything to change what happened.

 

[smithben1983]

very sorry to hear this Dave. That is hard to even read let alone live it. Best wish brother.

 

[dannymax]

Aw jeez Dave, I'm really sorry to hear about your buddy, the terrible place he must have been in and what the result is doing to you. Life throws some curve balls man, as you know, that very often don't make any sense at all. He put some time into the decision and apparently felt it was the best out for him....maybe an answer will be revealed....maybe not. It's going to take some time but the dust will settle, life will go on....we'll be here for you Brother!

 

[Redbone]

I'm very sorry to hear this Dave, it's tough to lose someone like this. When I was twelve I lost my dad and mother in a murder/ suicide to which I fought with for years trying to understand WHY. I have mostly come to terms with it but not completely, I doubt I ever will. I just know that they are in a better place now with the Good Lord above. My brother just went to heaven to have tea with my mom and a beer with my dad, and will be eternally happy and safe from now on.
Hang in there brother Dave, your on a rough road for now but were here to help you smooth out the big bumps so you can get on the throttle once again. Feel free to call me any time, nine o six 322 six nine four four.

 

[ninjaneer]

Dave I don't even know how or where to start. All I can say is that I have deep sincere sadness for you. I cant offer any answers or reasons that could comfort you. I can only say that not only are you not alone in having the misfortune of having to make sense of it all, but you are also not alone as you try to make sense of it all--you are surrounded by friends who can support you as you struggle to find the answers. In my journey through life I have discovered that not only are there inexplicable wonders and miracles, but there are also inexplicable tragedies. I hope and pray for you to find the strength to get through this tragedy.

 

[CaptainKyle]

Dave I will be back in town around noon tomorrow if you wanna take a ride or just vent some. You know this is what happened to my ex and its a hard thing to dealings with.

 

[poppop]

I could not be more sorry.No one but god and him know the answer.Real friends are far and few.Wife read with tear filled eyes.God bless Him and you.

 

[SpecOps13]

Mary and I searched the web for any news. Absolutely nothing. No Obituary, no news at all. I rode one of the bikes to his house and there's no police tape or anything. His truck isn't there. That's not really out of the ordinary. I would have climbed over his privacy fence but figured someone in the neighborhood may shoot me or worse.:icon_axe:

All of you here are proving what I already know. We may not have met face to face and shook hands but you're all the best People / Brothers and Sisters on the planet...

I called all of our friends that I thought might be in the same kind of mode to end their lives. I didn't mention anything that had happened. Several are unemployed and have been for a long time, even though they search for work daily. One has gone through a devastating divorce and has been out of work for many months. They all are on the verge of loosing everything or already have. I told them we'll fill the house and then set up tents in my back yard and run power cords so they can survive.. Whatever it takes. I've tried to stay on top of which ones were in despair and help them any way I could. The one who's gone had everything going for him. You just don't know, gotta do all you can for those you can. And hope it's enough.... :sad2:

Thanks for all the moral support and offers of help....
Dave

 

[BIGMO]

Sorry for the loss of your friend Dave. I think we have all asked that question a few times. why.

 

[DakRatFink]

Very sorry for your loss, Dave. The "Why" is usually the second hardest thing to deal with beyond the initial actual grief.

 

[Fire-medic]

PM sent.