Hell Explained

[Jack Butler]

HELL EXPLAINED ​

BY A CHEMISTRY STUDENT ​

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student.


The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

1. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? ​

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. ​

One student, however, wrote the following: ​

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely.. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. ​

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.​

This gives two possibilities: ​

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. ​

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. ​

So which is it? ​

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ....leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.' ​

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.​

 

[Elimax]

I believe that "Hell" could be more aptly defined by trying to read a post that's in BLACK, ITALICIZED, and TINY font size.

Thank you.

Elimax

 

[SpecOps13]

I'll copy and put it in a text editor so I can change the colors later. I can't read it.

 

[Rollie]

After changing colors to blue , so I could read it , that was excellent !!! :clapping::clapping::clapping:

 

[4gasem]

Funny but FALSE!

http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp

 

[richwrench]

Just drag your mouse over it & highlight it - then it's easy to read.
I got a kick out of it. :biglaugh:

 

[4gasem]

I fixed it!

 

[Jack Butler]

Quit a sleuth there 4... good job!
...my eyes must be better than most, sorry fellas.
I believe very little of what I read...other then the technical on this site, so....
I thought you might enjoy the perspective....oh well?

 

[SpecOps13]

That was worth every second of the wait to read. The student should get the Nobel Peace Prize for that. :biglaugh: After all, our beloved Prez got it for something that probably wasn't near as funny.:bang head:

Dave

 

[FREERIDER]

:angry flame devil:May you be in Heaven for at least half an hour before the Devil knows your dead.:angry flame devil:
An Irish toast.

I love it when Hell freezes over and wemen will sleep with me.:rofl_200::rofl_200: